Two Minds

While daisychaining my way across the internet in the past few days, I have collected a few new blogs to read. I'm of two minds about this. One mind tells me that I don't want to collect blogs to read. I've spent quite some time (over a year now) significantly reducing my online time. I've developed a disinterest in sitting at the computer for hours... which is a completely misleading statement, given that I have a laptop and can sit or lay comfortably where ever I choose (within reason, as defined by me and my circumstances), and I spend inordinate amounts of time cruising the 'net on my iPad, too. Which seems to fly in the face of my "I've spend time reducing my online time" statement. I've been less "active", more of a passive internet consumer. Rarely checking facebook, rarely reading or commenting on blogs, going so far as to nearly dread checking my email. I just haven't had the energy or the interest in re-building an online community.

My other mind remembers how much I did enjoy being a part of an online community. Reading and commenting on other people's blogs, writing my own, and whatever else I did that I enjoyed (very descriptive, that). I'll read other people's blogs or webpages, and truly want to write again.

Slowly, I am learning to accept that my preferences are not set in stone. Maybe I actually am flaky or flighty, or some other unstable adjective that carries negative connotations. Today, I might want to write and blog and be online. Tomorrow, I may genuinely detest the thought with every fiber of my being. The day after tomorrow, a few of my fibers might decide to enjoy technology again, in moderation, while a few more fibers want to fling themselves whole-heartedly into the blogosphere (I guess those would be the cardiac fibers?). I just never know. I'm kind of like a spectator in my own skin, waiting to see what all these fibers will weave themselves into from moment to moment.

And somehow my girl-cat has turned off the track pad on my laptop. You'd think she'd have gone for the mouse instead.